Let Her Go

I dreamt of her again,

She was pressed against me,

As we held one another in bittersweet embrace,

Our lips threatened to consume each other,

Though it's been two decades since you left this world.

Let her go,

Such a sweet smelling fiction,

Such a beautiful fantasy of Heaven,

Is not one I can attain,

And not one I deserve.

You left me long ago,

When we were still kids.

Ten years old is too young to live the pain you felt,

And younger still to decide the pain was too much,

Your memory still lives in my mind.

Let her go,

Her memory, my childhood love,

The reason I may never love again.

But I can't help thinking if I don't remember you,

I wouldn't deserve to feel such a connection again.

Let her go?

How could I ever forget?

Your tormented eyes, your cold gaze as you hit the floor.

How the hell was a child supposed to endure such torment?

And how was I the only one to witness your pain?

Even the savage, carnal retribution inflicted on your tormentor brought me little closure,

And indeed,

Only made me feel more numb, more detached, less human,

And far least worthy of your memory.

I miss you Claire.

End.

H