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My Life's a Lie

somber poem/song about derealization

By CT IdlehousePublished 10 days ago 1 min read

Grew up feeling unwanted...

Not even by my own parents.

Don't want your pity,

I want your peace,

I want to fall

In love with me.

I want to feel

Something else but grief.

/

I don't expect you to understand...

All my life used to be planned...

But then I learned that God's just a man

Wanting me to give into demands.

/

No, I'm not okay,

But you don't care,

So I'll say I'm fine.

No, I'm not okay,

Nothing is fair,

It hurts to be alive.

No, I'm not okay,

So don't you dare,

Tell me to smile.

I'm not okay,

I'm really scared,

That my life's a lie.

/

I feel like my years were stolen...

My mind warped from harsh religion.

If I had learned

What I know now

Would I even be alive

Or just bones in the ground?

The world's indifferent

I'm just finding out.

/

I don't expect you to fix anything.

I'm not a bird with broken wings.

I just want to be a wanted thing...

Not a backup bitch for emergencies.

/

No, I'm not okay,

But you don't care,

So I'll say I'm fine.

No, I'm not okay,

Nothing is fair,

It hurts to be alive.

No, I'm not okay,

So don't you dare,

Tell me to smile.

I'm not okay,

I'm really scared,

That my life's a lie.

/

I don't even know how to trust anymore...

My heart's a shattered mess in a glass jar.

Apologies aren't going to heal my scars.

I feel trapped to this track like a cable car.

/

No, I'm not okay,

But you don't care,

So I'll say I'm fine.

No, I'm not okay,

Nothing is fair,

It hurts to be alive.

No, I'm not okay,

So don't you dare,

Tell me to smile.

I'm not okay,

I'm really scared,

That my life's a lie.

social commentarySong Lyricssad poetry

About the Creator

CT Idlehouse

I write stories and articles. Sometimes they're good.

Reader insights

Nice work

Very well written. Keep up the good work!

Top insight

  1. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

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Comments (2)

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  • Tina D. Lopez8 days ago

    Damn..you say everything I want to say so powerfully.

  • Dylan 10 days ago

    Pretty good!

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