single
Non-nuclear is the new normal; sometimes one head is better than two.
The Single Mothers Survival Guide Series - A Written Plan
“Many Wisdom traditions tell us to call things that are not as though they are!” As single mothers, what is it we want to accomplish? Own our own business? Write a book? Meet Mr. Right? Spend more time together as a family? Have more outings—or maybe just feel normal again? Since it is easy to stay in a survival mode, most single mothers go into this mode first. Not only that, it is very easy to stay in this mode because just to survive at this point takes a tremendous amount of intelligence and energy. The goal I wanted to attain was to thrive, not just survive. To thrive, after a reasonable amount of time you must first get out of the survival mode. The next step is creating a roadmap, or a (once again) written plan that comes from your vision of what you feel you want or need in order to thrive.
By Nicole Orozco6 years ago in Families
The Single Mothers Survival Guide Series - Victim No More
“Mentors are lifelines in the bridge over the deep waters of victim to victor.” Living independently from others’ viewpoints requires that we take responsibility for our own lives and actions. In order to do this, we must stop blaming others and stop playing the role of a victim. We may have been hurt, betrayed, or abandoned in our life, but if we stay stuck in this groove of being wounded, it will be difficult to progress to the steps that can lead to a happy and fulfilling life. To make matters worse, being a victim is a role our children can take on. There are three phases to the removal and healing of the victim pattern; acceptance, forgiveness and accountability.
By Nicole Orozco6 years ago in Families
The Single Mothers Survival Guide Series
“To sum it up, society needs a social shift in consciousness regarding the attitude it has toward single mothers.” I chose to write this series for single mothers, rather than for single parents. Please don’t misunderstand my motives, as I believe being a single father has many challenges. However, these experiences are best told by a single father, one who knows what it is to be there when his 13-year-old daughter starts menstruating, or when she wants to start dating. This could be a very awkward position, even for the most understanding and supportive dad. The perspective I offer is from a woman’s point of view and some of the feelings and situations that single moms go through in relating to society.
By Nicole Orozco6 years ago in Families
Moms Night Out
Do you hide in a bathroom or do you call a babysitter and spend the night out? Sometimes I hide in the bathroom, lol. When I do get a babysitter and go out, I usually go to a bar, but I have always wondered what it would be like to go to dinner and a movie with myself. I have never thought about what it would be like to enjoy some actual time to myself. When I do go out to the bar, I go with one of my best friends, who is also a mom, and we really enjoy the time out. We talk and have conversations and laugh, it is really enjoyable and what a mom’s night out is really about. Hiding in the bathroom is not the way to have time alone, doing something that makes you happy during your time away from your kids is what a mom’s night is all about.
By Ashlee Grant6 years ago in Families
Tragic Passion & Toxic Love: Part 4; The One Who Got Away
I had to sneak him in my house because my stepdad hated him, because he was... abusive to me and jealous of Taylor but my man needed me so I did everything I could. Until I couldn't anymore when I got caught. So we left. I had a place to go but it wasn't a home, Taylor's company was more of a home than living there in all that money could provide. We had the most embarrassing time of our lives that year... It changed us both. What left me dumbfounded though was this, despite being addicts & having nada, nothing to eat or drink, or cigarettes because yeah I've got a great many unhealthy vices... There were so many times when despite having nothing but each other, we would laugh and laugh and laugh, and even have fun sometimes, and at the time, that seemed so important, almost worth it. I never forgot about Noah, before I totaled my car I'd spend A LOT of time there, not as much as I wanted to or should have though. I missed him everyday and I have to live with every choice I've made that's brought me here. I thought the deep love we shared was more important than anything money could buy, I mean I grew up dreaming about true love and wanting nothing more. And maybe I was right... if you didn't have children who meant too much to you to just let go of. So, neither of us ever gave up on obtaining that needed growth. We spent a great deal of time living in all sorts of situations. I had began spiraling so far out of control with trying to be and STAY numb, I'd get so messed up, I'd cheat. Remember, hate myself, and tell him. I was a walking sharknado. Not tornado, SHARKNADO. I never meant to hurt him. I was lost and broken and clearly mentally ill of some sort. But he forgave me over, and fucking over. Even after the one time I didn't need to be drunk and high, because of real feelings, he still stayed, and I don't know why. I was bad. I was a legit villain. We ended up moving to this dude's house in Central FL, after his family moved to Ocala. We thought it was the start of a new beginning but it was obvious it wasn't going to work because the guy was just nuts, this time it wasn't even entirely my fault. There is never a reason to treat someone with no respect, and that's how the dude was treating Taylor. I snapped and made valid points and got kicked out. After that, I had to go back to my mom, and yeah, abuse... and Taylor was dropped off in Ocala after I asked his mom to let him try one more time and when she said yes, we said goodbye. It was the greatest thing for him. For us both really. He really started rebuilding himself. I took a bit longer. One day, everything he tried teaching me, hit me at once. For the first time in my life, I saw myself through everyone else's eyes. It was one of the most painful realizations I've ever experienced, but I thanked God nonetheless. We kept our relationship going long distance, but ended it mutually in late 2017. In the end, I think Taylor saved my life in many ways. Through suicidal thoughts, my love kept me here, through turning into a MONSTROUS person he didn't give up, and even though it took far too long, his words eventually taught me what I needed to learn, and I still think of them and practice it all everyday because he was right. I've had many opportunities to give up on motherhood, but I would never. I realized I could never be happy without my son. Taylor helped me learn to control my reactions, my anger, emotions, etc. and he taught me how to love, and that not all people show it the same way. He has many flaws, he's a total dickhead at times... but I don't think either of us will ever forget any of it, and he's a present, and a truly good father to our son Noah. Both boys talk from time to time, we both have our 2nd's adoptive parents on social media and their numbers. My boys are happy, loved, stable, safe, healthy, and Noah will always have me in his life. It's mostly thanks to him that I never gave up. And now I'm in a place... where I can say I'm A LOT more proud of the woman I'm turning out to be, I have a lot of people to thank for that, mostly the man I did not deserve, and because of that, I'll always stand by, but I guess I was just ready to grow up and take my life into my own hands. We went through HELL, and I've asked God why, a lot... but I'll make another post about that. As for Taylor, he's doing so great, and I'm so proud, and grateful. I'll always have love for him. That doesn't die. As far as romance goes in my future, I'm more focused on and excited about building a career and name for myself. Whatever is meant to be will be. :)
By Audrey Elena6 years ago in Families
A new single Father.
Hey Vocal+ Friends, My Vocalizers. I will omit my name for the moment, as I am uncertain of this platform. My Ex and I had a beautiful baby daughter nearly 8 months ago, a mere 2 months after we started dating and as you can expect our relationship went sour. I am not here to talk about what happen today; nor about the relationship at all, but to speak on my lifelong fears, that have come true.
By A single Father6 years ago in Families
Single and not ready to mingle!
I honestly don’t even know where the heck to begin with my life except that I am a single mother of two beautiful children. My name is Jillian and let me tell you this, if you are thinking about having kids get ready to die to self. I didn’t realize how selfish of a person I was until I had my children. I can’t use the bathroom without them banging on the door, “LET ME IN”, or cleaning the bedroom while my 3 year old son is putting freaking flour in the toaster oven and the dishwasher.
By Jillian Cortez6 years ago in Families
