A LETTER TO MY NINE YEAR OLD SELF

And on the days when the grief feels just a little heavier,
I hope the love does too.
I hope you sit in his favorite spot,
play all his favorite songs,
and put on his clothes
and fall asleep with them still on.
I hope these things remind you
that it was such a blessing to have loved someone
so deeply
that they are worth missing.
I hope you cry,
not because it’s over,
but because it happened,
and because when you miss him so much,
you’re reminded of that magic.
That suffering a great loss
doesn’t take away from a great love.
And that heaven is never too far away
if you just look up.
On the good days and the bad days,
I hope your grief is a reminder
that you experienced true love,
even if it didn’t last forever.
And I hope you know how lucky you are
to have loved someone so special,
that saying goodbye
hurts this much.