addiction
The realities of addition; the truth about living under, above and beyond the influence of drugs and alcohol.
Vengeance at the Bottom of a Bottle
The dirt smeared mirror doesn’t give much of a reflection, but it is enough for me to see my ruined appearance. My mangled hair, split bottom lip, the dark purple goose egg that has started to sprout beneath my right eye. While this is not the worst I have looked after one of his beatings, that does little to satiate my overflowing anger. There was a time when I used to feel sorry for myself. I used to feel like the world had wronged me in so many ways. Bringing me this sweet and loving man. The first man I ever trusted since my father left me 19 years ago. This man who I thought was loving, godly, and kind. It only took him two years, two years for him to finally lash out at me. And that was it, that man I thought I knew was gone. And all that was left was an angry, drunk ass.
By Kelly Sapien7 years ago in Psyche
Unbecoming The First Teacher
My icy fade. The window is black. The star's light gaze is to save me from the pain of going insane in aloneness. No level of awokeness can restore me to eternal bliss amidst the suffering and the plight amongst the addict generation. I sink, I sink, I sink into the affirmation of the 3 c's. I didn't cause it. I can't control it. I can't cure it.
By Kels Finex7 years ago in Psyche
The Short Walk Home
Walking the short journey from the bus stop to my house for the millionth time, I become suddenly drawn into the characters that I encounter on this short trip, little more than a minute from stepping off and escaping from the UTTER CHAOS that the 18 bus consists of most evenings, to my front door. It is usually this moment in my day when I can reflect on the latest of unreal occurrences that I, and the rest of the minority of normal people, have had to bear witness to on this vessel of unpredictable horrors. But not on this night. No.
By Grayson Articles7 years ago in Psyche
Breaking the Hold You Had on Me
It was 2017 and at the time, I thought I was just like everyone else. Working to get ahead, just serving tables full time until something new came along or until I found my career path. Then, I was reintroduced to you at a party one night after turning twenty one. We had met a couple of times outside of class back in high school, but our times together never ended well. As the party went on, we got to know each other more and more and at the time I thought you were so cool and fun to be around. As the days continued to roll by, I found myself meeting up with you after I would leave work. Sometimes we’d meet at bars, sometimes I’d just pick you up and we’d go to my house. We had the greatest times, even went to parties together and made the greatest of memories. As time went on though, I noticed that you were beginning to be around more and more; until eventually it was like you never left my side and you were starting to get in the way of some things. If I had family plans, you’d find a way to get me to bail and crash a party with you or convince me to call off work so we could get together. I’ll admit, at the time it wasn’t a big deal to me; I enjoyed your company. I enjoyed our times together so much, the giddy laughter, the loud and vibrant music in our background, it was exciting. It was a thrill, until you started introducing me to your friends. That’s where everything fell apart but You wouldn’t let me go. It got to the point where I wasn’t showing up to work and if I had then it wasn’t for long because you’d call me with an excuse for me to leave, even my managers knew what was going on. We’d be out in the city all night, getting mixed up in all the wrong things, causing disturbances everywhere we went together. Your friends were even attached at my hip, always asking me to take them with me or to say hello before I leave, it was taking a toll on me. I ended up being with you and your friends so much that I lost track of everything around me, forgetting important dates and forgetting things I had done or needed to do, I was losing sleep and not eating; just to be with you and your friends. I thought you guys liked me, that you wanted to be with me because I was great, not because you wanted to tear me down. That’s exactly what you did, you and your friends had such a grip on me that I lost myself to you, I had forgotten who I was and every moment without you left me in cold shakes and paralyzing anxiety. I lost my Job because of you, I lost my apartment because of you, I even lost my friends because once I decided to drop you, you latched on to them and kept dragging them into your schemes.
By Brendon N.7 years ago in Psyche
The Power of Addiction...and a Message of Hope
Addiction is such an important topic today. And yet, all too often, we see addiction as a problem dealt with by others—and not our own problem. However, the stark reality is that today, the sad numbers being generated by America's opioid epidemic mean that all of us are being impacted by the costs of this disease in one way or another. And far, far too many of us know—or will know—a family member, friend, classmate, or colleague who is fighting their own addiction battle or whose life is ended by the effects of the highly addictive opiate drugs commonly available—both legally and illegally—today.
By David Wyld7 years ago in Psyche
Addiction, and the Paramedic
Addiction is taking its toll. There have been so many overdoses in my district, that not only are we short on Narcan some days, we are also short on responders. I am not one to judge. As a paramedic, I see people at their worst moments in many different situations. I am putting in my two cents today, because I feel not only addicts are suffering, but families, responders, etc. I have to elaborate on my own experiences as a result of addictions of others. This is in no way meant to be judgmental, or to condemn, I am hoping my catharsis can help someone.
By Kathy Roadman7 years ago in Psyche
Addiction, a Choice or Disease?
Addiction, is it a choice or a disease? This is a controversial question that has plagued the Internet as of late. Although this is not a new debate I am seeing more and more Memes, studies, comments and blogs about this topic. After much thought I decided to address the issue publicly, add my point of view and possibly ruffle some feathers.
By Tiffany Michael7 years ago in Psyche
What Addiction Means
I recently read a passage of a book titled Does Capitalism Drive Drug Addiction by Johann Hari in which outlined the addiction debate of both the left and right wing which is this: Right wing believes addiction is caused by a moral failure as it is a choice to consume a drug the first time and the left wing's stand is a similar chemical imbalance as exists in depression.
By Mars Saint7 years ago in Psyche
How I Broke Myself
There are too many people in this world who know the feeling: the nonstop urge, a relentless craving of something to feel right; to feel whole. I know very well the suffering that accompanies a life of addiction. My whole life I have struggled with trying to fill an unexplained void at all desperation. It didn't start with Budweiser and 1800 Tequila, that much I can testify. It started with gasoline and cocaine as a matter of fact. Foil boils and a few broken televisions hidden in the woods behind my apartment complex was my home away from home. I was nothing more than an angry eleven year old looking for warmth. I grew up feeling alone and worthless as an effect of an emotionally unavailable mother with two jobs and an emotionally and physically abusive sister. In the home, there was always tension and dysfunction; outside the home, there was always tension and dysfunction. With my role models rolling up weed and chasing white lines in front of me, I never stood a chance. Such is the story of my addiction.
By samy costello7 years ago in Psyche
