humor
"Humor is what binds humans together and makes difficult times just a little less painful; Sometimes you can't help but laugh. "
A Cubicle Of Ones Own
Dale’s office was small, but in many ways, this was his home. More than the one-bedroom he shared with his half blind tabby, Sergeant Furry. More than where he had grown up in a run-down split level beside the mega mall. It was where his computer was, where he had the picture of himself standing beside the Matt Damon look alike he had met at Comic-Expo. It was where he hung his singing fish. Of course, he had to take the batteries out because, Don’t Worry Be Happy got on his colleagues’ nerves.
By Alain Goulem5 years ago in Humans
Libra
Libra Let’s start with our supposed strength. Number 1 is Cooperative, and I am very cooperative as long as everyone is willing to do things exactly as I want them. Number 2 diplomatic, oh, that is me to a tee, that’s why I can’t understand why I’ve been fired so much. I mean, on my last job, I am pretty sure that I told my boss he was the biggest idiot I had ever met. After he had turned down an 11,000,000.00 investor that I lined up for him, oh boy, was I diplomatic. I used no foul language when I informed him that with another brain, he’d be a halfwit Number 3. Libras are gracious; I can be every other Sunday as long as there is a bottle of Medoc around. 4.Fair-minded, I want to be fair, but life and GOP don’t give you a lot of slack on that one. Social – Sure, as long as everyone leaves me the f**k alone. So, Let’s hear it for my strong points. Hoora----y!
By Michael Lee Tucker5 years ago in Humans
Burmp and Karen
I have until the big shiny thing in the sky touches the ground to turn this pile of sticks into a fire. If I don’t, Burmp will take one of the bones from one of the mammoths she caught, the thick tree trunk-looking one as long as me, and hit me in the head with it. She promised to do that if I didn’t win the fire-making contest. The winner gets a coat made out of tiger fur, a stick that when you shake it makes it rain, and a VERY shiny rock. So I told Burmp I would win it for her. But here’s something I should have thought about before I made that promise: I have no clue how to make fire.
By Jack Morgan5 years ago in Humans
Better for the bottom line
John Crowley had attended many board meetings in his life, but he had never been in a whiter room than he was in now. In fact he had never seen anything so blindingly white, and it took his eyes several moments to adjust. He rubbed them briefly before he could see, and it was at that moment he realized he was holding a little black book. How odd.
By John Odonah5 years ago in Humans
The Little black Book
The little black book had been in her family for generations. Every year, the bearer of this book would open it on it’s birthday and read the new prophecy. It was Eva’s turn to read the book. You never knew what the book would announce: war, marriage, death. Sometimes it would be good news, sometimes terrible. This year Eva prayed it would be some kind of clues to get money: surprised inheritance, the PowerBall numbers, anything would do. She was broke like she had never been before!
By Elodie Massa5 years ago in Humans
The Little Ram
I like signs that point out restaurants at the next exit after you’ve been driving for hours looking for something other than McDonald’s. I like signs of warning, especially the ones for spicy foods. There’s nothing worse than taking a long-awaited bite of a new Chinese dish and you missed the four little red peppers next to it on the menu.
By Jess Osborne5 years ago in Humans
Butter
I’d like to say I hadn’t pictured my life going like this but, honestly, it’s pretty damn close. Peaches and I grew up in the boons where kids threw rocks at windows or stole hood ornaments off cars for something to do. Thinking back now, it was stupid to expect anything else from that crap hole town.
By Janet Macpherson5 years ago in Humans
The Will to Aggravate
It’s not every morning that I wake up angry. It’s not because my aunt died - I hated her. She was the bane of everyone’s existence, making us miserable from the moment she woke up till the moment she went to sleep. The woman was obnoxious, selfish and rude, not to mention a proud racist and homophobe. No, I was angry because she had apparently put me in her will, and I was to report to her attorney’s office promptly at 9 a.m. to hear him read it.
By Krista Golden5 years ago in Humans
